#if any dovifuckers see anything I got wrong or left out feel free to chime in

[multiseb21]

As someone who doesn’t follow motogp what exactly is an unemployed ass patch?

let me set the scene…Dovi had been at Ducati since 2013, lost a pretty close title fight to Marc Marquez in 2017, and finished runner-up to him again in 2018/2019. Cool.

soooo 2020 rolls around. covid. delayed season. Marc (obvious title favorite) flies too close to the sun during the FIRST race 🚬. Breaks his arm. Out for the season. Suddenly, this looks like Dovi’s championship to lose. No pressure. [EXTREMELY LOUD INCORRECT BUZZER] Also, Dovi’s contract is up for renewal. No biggie. [ANOTHER EXTREMELY LOUD INCORRECT BUZZER]

Things…uhhhh…don’t go great on the contract negotiation front. Apparently, Dovi and Ducati’s general manager, Gigi Dall’lgna (think of him as motogp’s adrian newey), haven’t exactly seen eye-to-eye no height pun intended since 2017 and can’t speak to each other “calmly.” hot. sorry.

On August 15, Dovi announces that he’ll leave Ducati at the end of the season. and then. WINS the race the next day. CUNTYYYYYYYYY

Now, this is finally where the ass patch comes in. All season, Dovi’s leathers said “undaunted” across the ass. Cute I guess. Horseshoe directly over hole? Whatever floats your boat.

So with Dovi’s unemployment era on the horizon, his friends made a bet. Naturally, he lost the bet. We got blessed with the most iconic ass patch of all time. The rest is history.

my beautiful unemployed balding diva